Review/Giveaway: My Life Balanced 120 Days Challenge V.02

If you've been following along for the last few months, you'll know I've been working through Vanessa Hartmann's My Life Balanced: 120 Day Challenge, and sharing my progress here.  I've come to the end of my initial 120 Days Challenge, but this wonderful workbook is designed to be used in an ongoing way, to help the user discover new goals for themselves, and to keep focused and mindful as they proceed.

Back in May, I began my journey, and shared my initial impressions and explained the basic set up of the book.  Each day (undated) provides food for thought in four areas: Mind (journal or meditation keywords), Meal (tips, affirmations or suggested activities to do in the area of how you eat), Move (tips, affirmations or suggested activities to do in the area of movement), and Mantra (an affirmation or statement to help keep you on track).

When I began, I knew certain aspects of this would be challenging for me, as changing habits always are.  In my first progress report, I explained how I was focusing on that - changing my routine and taking things slowly.  I even incorporated a Tarot reading (an already established habit for me) into the new habits, and it helped me understand a bit more about what it was I was doing and how to go about it.  Even after only three weeks I was beginning to learn more about myself and how the My Life Balanced Program could help me make the changes I wanted to make - not to be different, but to be more in tune with my own priorities.

My next update was all about the challenges - a few disruptions to my routine was feeling as if it was derailing my progress, but I also realized that handing challenging disruptions is one of the key lessons to success in establishing healthy life changes!  Anyone working through this program is eventually going to uncover their own derailers, and the beauty of the 120 Days Challenge is that so many aspects of it involve small actions and opportunities for mindfulness. They don't really take a lot of time and I found that when you allow them to have a place, they can change the way you see those times - not as interruptions to life, but life itself.

Since then, I have found if I can do nothing else, take a few moments to do the included breathing suggestions, and spend the time focusing on the Mind keyword.  Just that helps to put whatever else is going on into perspective.

Meditation was the focus of my next progress report - I truly found this aspect to be the most meaningful and useful aspect of the My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge.  The breathing exercises are easy enough for anyone to do, and really do make all the rest easier, too.  Several suggestions for incorporating yoga are sprinkled throughout - for these, you'll want to use outside resources to show you specifics about yoga postures and movement (throughout this series, outside reading/video viewing/etc. will be necessary - you're building your own program, not following a script).  In my progress report, I included two forms of meditation I've found useful: walking meditations and a visualization exercise.  I also explained the importance of Vanessa's focus on 'body scans' - paying attention to what your body is desiring and needing, so that you can provide it.

My next updated focused on food - eating to live well, whatever that means to the user.  Before I began, I was concerned that Vanessa's personal choice to live as a vegetarian would make this part largely irrelevant to my own eating goals but in fact, it was never an issue at all.  She includes a number of excellent food tips and tidbits of information (which, again, often sent me out onto the Internet to explore further), many of which I have incorporated and some I've chosen not to, or put off for later consideration.  I shared a few of the things I learned in this update, and by this point I was realizing fully how different this experience will be for each user.  Vanessa never tells you what to do - she gives you the tools and encouragement for you to develop your own challenge according to your own goals and needs.

Finally, my last progress report was on the subject of Movement - this has always been a complex challenge for me and continues to be one, and it is also the biggest reason why I will be returning to this workbook again and again.  Here again, I learned a few things about myself that will help me strive to do what is best for me in this area, in a way that is very different from past 'exercise regimens that always left me feeling like an inadequate failure before I'd even began.

The My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge workbook never tries to make you feel inadequate or lazy or not tough enough to be fit.  It sticks to small changes, lots of encouragement, and reminders that your body isn't something to hate or be in an adversarial relationship with.  For anyone who's ever struggled with body image and negative self-talk, you NEED this.  I have come across a lot of programs over the years, but I have never seen something so consistently sending the message that you're supposed to like your body, pay attention to what it's saying, and that taking care of it should be a gentle and joyful expression of loving yourself, not punishment for not being perfect.

As you can see, that is the message from the very first day, and it's repeated throughout the entire book (and it takes a lot of repetition of these ideas if you've bought into our culture's more usual shaming method of 'self improvement'):

I do encourage you to read over my past updates to get into more details about the workbook itself and will end my review only with this:

This workbook is incredibly versatile - I can't actually think of any category of person who wouldn't benefit from it, whether you are, like me, struggling with disability or already in good shape and seeking fine tuning. If you've never thought about personal wellness goals beyond a vague 'I oughta do something about that', or already have a deep understanding of what your goals are, the My Life Balanced workbook can help you.

The last few pages of the workbook are a special bonus - because it is meant to be used in an ongoing way, you can get through it 3 times a year, adding up to 360 days - so there are 5 extra pages at the end to get you through the entire year, offering extra guidance on the benefits of healthier living, handling the negativity of comparing yourself and your progress to others, the basic components of weight loss, how to listen to your body, and a list of recommended books (including cookbooks).

The one single negative I experienced was the size of the book - my copy is large and floppy - it doesn't travel well and I found myself often wanting to access it while away from home (it's such a great thing to peek into while you're stuck waiting somewhere).  A few weeks ago, Vanessa set to work on a revised version, editing and updating her text and - best part - making it smaller so that it can be tucked into a purse or bag.  This smaller edition, along with a small notepad turns the program into a powerful tool for busy people on the go!

What a difference size makes!

I love the the new version is bound at the top - this also allows for the biggest thing I wished was possible - you could open that to the current day and prop it on a desk or counter (where ever you can see it often), and have frequent reminders of what your focus for the day is.  Huzzah!

The newly revised My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge workbook can be purchased from Vanessa's website for $36.00, shipping included.  She also offers a couple of other guidebooks (including a 21 Day Minimalism challenge), as well as local and long distance life coaching.

If you'd like to explore more of what Vanessa does, please check out her several posts here at Reviews, Chews & How-Tos.  You can also follow her on Facebook, check out many of her workout and advice videos on YouTube, and she's even started a healthy food blog to support her My Life Balanced program.

When you check out her My Life Balanced website, make sure you sign up on the front page to receive a 10 day sampler of the 120 Days Life Style Change Manual!

Finally, I'm very excited that she's offered to give a copy of the revised My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge workbook to one of our US readers!  Read on to see how you can enter (and you want to enter this one, I promise!).

http://www.mylifebalanced.com/
https://www.facebook.com/mylifebalancedcoaching
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxZH_Vge6QEC0Vg45iY_FmQ
http://mylifebalanced.weebly.com/

To enter the giveaway, leave a comment in this entry as instructed by the Rafflecopter, then leave the name you commented under and your email in the box in the Rafflecopter entry. (This allows us to contact you if you win!)  This will open up additional optional entries to increase your odds of winning.

This giveaway is open to US RESIDENTS ONLY
and will end just before midnight ET on 10-14-15. 

The winners will be notified by email within 24 hours after the end of the giveaway.  In order to claim the giveaway prize, the winner will need to respond within 24 hours of notification, or an alternate winner will be selected.

Once the winner(s) have responded and confirm, their first name will be posted on our Giveaways page. 

Good luck everyone!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

 

My Life Balanced 120 Days Challenge: Movement

When I started the My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge, I knew the hardest part would be managing an organized method of adding consistent movement into my daily life, and I was right.

As I come to the end of my first pass trough Vanessa Hartmann's self-study workbook, this is the area where I've made the least significant progress.  I think I'm made great strides toward increasing mindful eating habits, incorporating periods of meditation, killing off negative self-talk and unnecessary stressors, and I've come away with a lot of great ideas for how to increase healthy movement, but actually making it a more natural and intentional part of my life is going to take me more than 120 days to figure out.

My reasons are the same as when I began - I've spent my adult life needing to adapt to the demands of Rheumatoid Arthritis and over the last 15 years especially, that's come with some advanced degeneration in my hands (which makes many simple tasks challenging and painful even when I'm not flaring), balance issues and an inability to get down on the ground if I want to get back up, both of which come from a hip surgery and a tendency to be at risk for dislocation if I'm not cautious.

Adding to the fun, RA comes with exhaustion at inopportune times - the kind where you have to convince yourself you can probably walk all the way to the bathroom.  The kind where holding a coffee cup that suddenly feels like a bowling ball becomes the most strenuous thing you can pull off.  The kind that means activity that expends physical energy takes at least three times the same amount of time to recover from, and sometimes you just can't block out that much time to do nothing.

These things aren't going away, ever - all the happy pharmaceutical advertisements aside, I'll not be playing tennis or bungee jumping or jazz dancing no matter how under control my RA is.

It doesn't mean exercise can't happen - it not only can, but it must to keep my body as operable as it needs to be.  I'm on board with that, but after going through this process as a self-study program, what I realize is that I really do need some directed training/mentoring from someone experienced in working with chronic autoimmune disorders to help me figure out what I can do safely and sanely without risking harm.

(Seriously - think about how much you wouldn't risk if you knew from previous experience that falling down will put you through a hip dislocation - which for the record, hurts about 100x more than the original fracture and that hurt a LOT - a possible stay in the hospital and having to relearn to walk and repair surrounding tendons all over again. AGAIN.)


These are not issues most people using this program will have, and I consider the lessons learned in the My Life Balanced workbook as a framework for the next step for me in this area. I just know I need more directed help to get there.  I am very intrigued by incorporating yoga or Tai Chi into my life, but I am at a loss when it comes to learning it without a coach or at least a spotter.  So, my next order of business when I'm able, is hunting down a way to do so.

That out of the way, here is the thing I love about the MLB focus on movement:

Calling it MOVEMENT, rather than exercise or torture.  You will not find such horrible statements as "No pain, no gain" in here.

Movement includes enjoying a walk on a cool morning, or dancing in your kitchen to your favorite song.  It includes yoga and stretching and relishing what your body can do.

Movement is what our bodies do, and the 120 Days Challenge will help you learn to appreciate what yours can do, and to have fun while doing it.  The stated goal for the Move section each day is to "Discover a form of movement that is enjoyable to practice regularly."

My currently favored current forms of movement are walking (when it isn't humid), swimming and 'water walking', which allows me to exercise muscles in a no-impact way that doesn't hurt my joints and gives me a safe watery environment where I don't need to worry about losing my footing, and dancing - although that last is something I can no longer do in any particularly aerobic way, so for me it's joyful movement, not exercise.  Joyful is good!

In summary, the My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge can be enormously useful to your progress to increase movement in your routine if you are:

- generally healthy
seeking inspiration as your own exercise routine

- wanting to 'mix it up' if you already have a routine

- wishing to incorporate yoga, gentle stretching and balancing into your life

- seeking reminders and motivation rather than a specific workout plan

- willing and able to find outside guidance for your specific challenges and/or instructions on unfamiliar yoga movements or exercise forms.

While I haven't yet successfully developed an exercise routine that fits in with my challenges, I have identified the desire and need to find a person who can be with me as I do, and that's not anything I'd have considered at all prior to beginning this challenge.  My goals as I move forward are to find that mentor/spotter and focus intentional movement skills on areas that develop my balance and flexibility in a safe manner, in order to improve my overall health and give my body the best possible framework for living with rheumatoid arthritis.

While I need a face-to-face training companion for safety reasons, many people could readily succeed using the My Life Balanced workbook alone, or via a distance coach who can offer more individualized advice, information and motivational support..  In fact, this is another service Vanessa Hartmann offers, and if you're interested, you should contact her to discuss her availability via email, phone or video conference. Vanessa has a solid background in providing training and guidance for people who struggle with the special needs of those with autoimmune disorders, as well as those seeking to increase their fitness for health reasons and/or weightloss.

I'm very nearly done with my first 120 days - stay tuned for one more post in this series. Spoiler: Vanessa is offering a newly revised version of the My Life Balanced workbook as a Giveaway!

My Life Balanced
My Life Balanced on Facebook

Previous Posts in this Series:

My Life Balanced - Introduction to a New Series
My Life Balanced - 1st Progress Report
My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge (Heavy on the CHALLENGE!)
My Life Balanced: Meditation & Mindfulness
My Life Balanced: Eating Well to Live Well

My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge ~ Eating to Live Well

For those that haven't read my previous entries on this program (you can find them listed at the bottom of this one), the 120 Days Challenge is a self-study workbook that our own reviewer Vanessa Hartmann has written.  It pulls together a lot of the principles and practices she uses as a Life Coach and reinforces them through daily doses of information, inspiration, food for thought and mini-challenges to try on lifestyle alterations to see how they might work for you.

Each day offers these little gems in the areas of Mind (a one word theme for the day), Meal (eating related guidance), Move (activity related guidance) and Mantra (a statement of encouragement and inspiration). 

There is no solid outline of 'do this, this, this, that and get this result'.  Instead, the reader is encouraged to listen to their own body and attitudes to uncover the relationship between what we eat, do and think and how these things make us feel.  So each person will eventually be writing their own journey, not simply following Vanessa's.  What is right for me may not be right for you, and what you need to focus on my be very different from my own set of challenges and goals - and the My Life Balanced program accomodates that.





As I am moving firmly into the last quarter of my journey with the My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge, I want to talk about how it tackles the subject of food and nutrition.


A few of the things I've taken away directly from the daily work with this program are:

- Starting the Day Well.  starting the day with a glass of water and fresh lemon juice, which supports the immune system, aids digestion, and has other benefits.  I find it to be both refreshing and hydrating after a night of sleep, and while I still enjoy my coffee after, this has become an enjoyable wake up routine for me.

- Probiotics, probiotics, probiotics.  I already understood intellectually that it was a good idea to incorporate lacto-fermented foods into my regular diet, but the continued reinforcement and explanation of benefits to my digestive system (which is a wreck from longterm rheumatoid arthritis treatments and the development of GERD) has led me to make sure to always have good quality plain yogurt and fermented veggies on hand - and the frequent reminders keep me focused on actually eating them.  As a result of this and paying attention to how foods impact the way my body reactions, I have experienced a great reduction in episodes of severe acid reflux, and when it does happen, I know why.

- Reduce Processed Foods. Nearly complete reduction of heavily processed foods and reading labels thoroughly.  These are things I already was striving for, but 'life circumstances' had caused a lot of compromise to slip in, with noticeable impact on my eating habits.  The biggest thing I have noticed is that when I avoid these foods long enough not to feel dependent on them (not just the easily definable 'junk foods' but also various packaged meal helpers), when I do eat them they don't even particularly taste like food, and definitely don't taste good. But if I let myself continue to eat them I lose that sense of taste, I start craving them and the cycle begins all over again.  Real food just tastes better, creates a better sense of satiety, and is a lot more interesting. That it's actually also really good for you almost seems like a nice side effect.

- Satiety. This has become my standard for what is good for me to eat - it fills the desire that leads me to eat, so there is no temptation or need to eat a lot trying to 'fill the hole'.  When I find myself overeating something, I also notice it's a food that tends to make me feel not particularly good after.  When I choose what's right for me, a sensible portion size makes me feel satiated, not 'full' and I have no thought of hunting down something else to nibble on.  That awful 'oh why'd I eat all that?' feeling just never happens after a good meal full of variety and taste that is composed of foods my body needs.  I have decided it's far less important to try to minimize portions of things that don't satisfy me (which leads to wanting more), than it is to choose the right foods for me, and letting that sense of satiety tell me when I've had enough, and stopping when I hit that point.  It's almost always less than I think I'm going to want.

- Listen to Your Body. I've learned that two things that - for me - lead to terrible digestive issues, cravings, and a general sense of feeling unwell, to include rheumatoid flares, are sugars and grains containing gluten.  I'm well aware that these are things that generate a lot of opinion and counter opinion, but my body knows what it knows.  If I do eat either of these things, it is in very small portions, and early in the day so that I have time to deal with the resulting impact before I have to lay down.  And yes, I do sometimes indulge, but as much as possible, I only indulge on my own terms.

And sometimes it can't be much helped - yesterday, I spent the day out handling some medical issues, in an area with limited options for good choices, ate more of what wasn't a great idea than I should have, and paid for it.  Next time,  I will remember that and make better plans for how to deal with a long day and the need to eat without resorting to the fast food options that seemed the most convenient choice at the time.


I still have a long way to go but that's because the journey is lifelong - there is no place to arrive, just the journey itself.

I have come to believe there is no one magic nutrition regimen that fits everyone - I'm on board with the philosophy of reading your own signals and ignoring what your body is telling you.  What is right for now may not be right as your body continues to age and change. You also need to be flexible when you are undergoing a particular challenge to your health.  So adaptability and awareness are going to help you a lot more than a list of rules.

What the My Life Balanced workbook provides are signposts along the way pointing out interesting scenery and travel tips.  If any particular opportunity is not for you, let it go.  But it's worthwhile to check out the ones that challenge you to veer off your beaten path a bit, just to see if you like what's there.

In the end though, it's your own journey and what you make of it is up to you alone.

Previous Posts in this Series:

 
My Life Balanced - Introduction to a New Series
My Life Balanced - 1st Progress Report
My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge (Heavy on the CHALLENGE!)
My Life Balanced: Meditation & Mindfulness

 

My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge - Mindfulness & Meditation

For this My Life Balanced update, I want to focus on what I consider to be the biggest strengths of the 120 Days Challenge Workbook: its focus on mindfulness and various forms of meditation as a core practice that bolsters all the work being done to change and refine the users' work on their nutritional health and fitness.

As I've mentioned before, each day includes short statements that can be used to spark the direction of one's own goals from a holistic place that includes meditation or journaling, nutrition, movement, and food for thought.

On frequent rotation is the suggestion to do a 'body scan' - that is, to pause and listen to one's body - does it feel tight? Sore? Tired?  What is it craving - certain foods, movements, rest or activity?  What makes it feel relaxed or joyful or satisfied?

Body scans and me go way back - as someone who has lived with rheumatoid arthritis since my late teens, this is a frequent and useful way to pay attention to what is needed to treat symptoms and determine how to avoid overdoing (or underdoing) so that comfort and functionality can stay optimal.  It's a constantly shifting target - today may need to be a rest day, and tomorrow may be an opportunity to get a few extra things done, but the more you pay attention to your body's response to activity, food and stressors, the better you get at challenging yourself as far as you can while stopping short of the point where recovery costs more in energy than the original effort.

So, I really appreciate seeing it here as something that can and should be applied to everyone who uses the My Life Balanced process - because not only does the 'right' answer vary from person to person, it varies from day to day for each person.  So many 'plans' assume that everyone starts from the same place with the same resources, which sets people up to either be overchallenged (and set up for failure and feelings of guilt), or underchallenged and not seeing any significant results - turning effort into pointless busy work.

This sort of mindfulness of our own body's signals and responses to what we do with it is what enables the My Life Balanced Program to be infinitely modifiable to whatever each person seeks to get from it.  For me, the connection of meditation and inner work with the outer work of eating appropriately for me, and keeping my body as limber and functional as it can be is key to making this work for me.

Regarding meditation, I am also noticing another thing I really appreciate - there are a variety of meditational processes that are noted, as well as plenty of room to incorporate whatever methods have worked for you before starting it.

I am one of many who has never had very good results with the sort of meditation that involves no movement at all, and focuses on 'emptying the mind'.  Vanessa includes at the front of the book a few specific breathing techniques which are beyond helpful in attempting this form of meditation - breath provides a focus and a rhythm that makes it much easier to clear the mind (not so much empty it as declutter) because instead of 'trying' to focus on nothing, you're focusing on breath, releasing random thoughts and creating space to listen - to your body, to that still small voice of wisdom.

My favorite sort of meditation, though, involves more active movement.  One of the day's movement suggestions involved a form I used to love several years ago when I was more mobile - a walking meditation.

Try a walking meditation today. Choose a surface that we are able to walk barefoot on and connect with the ground. During our walk, bring all our awareness to what we feel with our feet connecting the earth.

I was really happy to be reminded of form of moving meditation, as it worked very well for me, and while I have been striving to walk more (I still use my Pacemaker walking sticks regularly), this offers me a great platform for getting back to an old pleasurable activity.

I plan to dust off my old copy of The Spirited Walker: Fitness Walking For Clarity, Balance, and Spiritual Connection and begin using it again. It is a truly lovely book that, much like the My Life Balanced Program, blends practical advice about walking with a spiritual meditative component that incorporates nature awareness, rhythm techniques, and other aspects of walking that make it an exercise in mindfulness as well as fitness.

Finally, I want to mention a third form of meditation practice that I find helpful - visualization.  Here, the purpose is not to empty the mind of stray thoughts but to visualize a thoughtform in order to experience it.

The one I use most often is a part of my spiritual practice and is a variation of a grounding and centering meditation used often by various people.  It is known as the Two Powers Meditation and can be done seated or standing, staying still or incorporating movement to reflect the visualization.

It can be done silently but it is also often done in groups, with one person talking it through for the others.  The basic process is to imagine yourself a tree (or 'the World Tree' - an ancient depiction of the cosmos), roots grounded deep in the earth, the trunk creating a home for all life on earth, and the branches reaching up to the heavens for light and nourishment.

In the meditation, you first stretch your roots down deep into the earth into a pool of water, drawing up cool energy into yourself - the Well of the World, where our ancestry and past are.  The cool watery energy is used to fill cauldrons within us, sometimes conceptualized as chakras.  Then you visualize life growing and living on our branches - all those things that share life with us here and now, and then reaching upward past the atmosphere and into the universe to draw down divine light and fire, filling those same spaces within so that the water and fire combine.  Finally, especially when done with a group, it is helpful to visualize one's branches extending outward and intertwining with one another so that together, we are a Grove, strengthened and supported by one another as we each are rooted firmly in the earth and nourished by the divine.

I know this particular visualization might not be for everyone, but I find it a very compelling metaphor and as a meditation practice, it stills my stress and 'busy brain', reminds me that I am supported in whatever I do, and gives me a perspective that reminds me that while this moment is all I have now, it is but a very small moment and nothing to stress over.

If you're interested in doing visualizaton work, searching iTunes or Amazon Music or YouTube will give you a huge collection to try out - find a few and see how they work for you.

Getting back to the My Life Balanced program, if your experience is anything like mine, you will find that, like that tree metaphor, it leads you to branch out, seek more information on those portions of it that appeal to dig deeper - learn more about specific practices unfamiliar to you, as well as draw on old and possibly neglected practices that have served you well in the past.  You won't find everything you need to know within its covers - and I think that is its strength.  It doesn't lay out a lot of 'must do' instructions, but instead is a launch pad to discover your own potential and passions.

And all that starts with a simple bit of mindfulness. Do a body scan. Listen to what your own body.. and mind.. and spirit... how are they expressing their needs and desires, and how might you respond?


Previous posts in this series:
 
My Life Balanced - Introduction to a New Series
My Life Balanced - 1st Progress Report
My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge (Heavy on the CHALLENGE!)

My Life Balanced: 120 Days Challenge Update (Heavy on the CHALLENGE)

My last three weeks with the My Life Balanced 120 Day Challenge program has been, well... challenging.  As a refresher, this is a workbook written by Vanessa Hartmann, a holistic life coach and minimalist (and one of our very own reviewers/contributors).  I've been working with this for about six weeks now, and I've hit some rough patches.

I am doing fine with the program when my day is routine, but I have found it very difficult to incorporate when I am being thrown for a loop by unusual circumstances.

Jury Duty

The biggest challenge was being called for jury duty for the first time.

I had very little idea what to expect, but was assured by those who have been through it that it was most likely going to involve sitting in a waiting room for a few hours and then being told to go home.  Should I actually be called to sit on a court case, that would likely be only a couple extra hours and that would be it.

I was to report to the courthouse by 7:30am - it was across town with heavy commuter traffic in between, so I had to be up and alert very, very early in the day, so the first thing that fell by the wayside was my usual morning routine.  No setting my intentions for the day and no decent breakfast, because there was simply no way I could face having to eat at 5:30 in the morning.

I did consider the likelihood of vending machines being my only lunch options and planned ahead to avoid that by bringing a large bottle of water and a container of salad along with a fork.  I also planned for 'sitting time' with reading material and my current stitchery project.  I'd have liked to have brought my My Life Balanced workbook, but it is in a large and unwieldy format so I left it at home. (Had I known how the day was going to go, I'd have written a few items from it on index cards to review!)

I lived to regret almost all of these choices - first, they made me toss both my fork and my brand new needlework scissors when I was going through security.  I should have thought about that last one - but I wasn't expecting the fork to be problematic, and I'd deliberately avoided a sandwich as a lunch option because I am avoiding bread! Plastic forks would have been allowed, but we don't use disposable tableware, and it never occurred to me to pick up a pack!  I had called the night before, as instructed, and they had a list of things not to bring - but forks was not one of the listed items.

So -  I was left with no way to eat my lunch, no way to stitch (and left to haul around both for no reason) and couldn't even avail myself of the vending machines because I only had a $20 bill with me, and the machines didn't take anything larger than a $10.

Topping it off, I got called with a large group of people (150!) to be considered for a jury, so we left the relative comfort of the waiting room and were instead crammed into a colonial era court room with narrow benches that would have made a virtuous Puritan cry - and in this room we weren't allowed to have anything out - no food or drink, no reading materials, nothing.

This picture is a LIE - you only get the comfy chairs if you're actually selected as one of the 12 jurors.

We sat and sat and sat, being asked a variety of questions and then those who needed to respond to those questions ("Are you, any of your family or close friends involved in law enforcement?"  "Have you, any of your family or close friends ever been the victim of a violent crime?") went up to the judge's bench to discuss their answers out of earshot - so even when there would have been some interesting people-watching opportunities, there wasn't.  Just a lot of waiting and doing nothing and trying not to feel my butt turning into a giant stone of pain with very little ability to shift or move because we were packed in so tightly.

After 9 hours of this - with a couple short breaks and an hour lunch, which I used to walk the grounds surrounding the courthouse, we were released. For the day - because they'd not only not found their jury but it turned out we were the 2nd round up - they'd narrowed down a similarly large group from the day before to around 80 and the following day, that group and what was left of ours would be combined and from that pool the 12 jurors would be selected.

I was actually a little excited about the prospect of being selected in spite of the physically and mentally taxing process facing me - while we didn't know the details of the trial yet and weren't allowed to look anything up about it, just the questions being asked made me realize this was no small trial. 

The next day I was better prepared - money for the vending machine, handheld nibbles that offered some nutrition in a container, and left hobby items at home.  I did pack a small notebook and a pen to hopefully keep hands and brain busy, but there was never opportunity to even sneak it out.  The second day was still a very early start time, so my 120 Days routine was a bust.  And I was TIRED and achy.  The only movement really possible was Kegels, and I did a whole lot of Kegels those two days, but it did nothing to alleviate the growing stiffness and inevitability that I was going to pay for this experience with a good old fashioned rheumatoid arthritis flare sometime in the next couple of days.

It was JUST LIKE this, except no scenery and we were packed in like sardines.

The long rounds of nothing-to-do mind numbing stretches of boredom were very imperfectly dealt with by trying to remember breathing and meditation techniques, interspersed with interesting things happening in the courtroom. 

Here's my one tip for jury duty (other than 'bring a plastic fork'):

If the judge asks if anyone present believes the sight of graphically violent photos would so upset you that you might not be able to render a fair and impartial decision based on the evidence, and you don't want to be called - say YES, you are not able to do that.

When he asked that question, about 8 people stood up, and instead of calling them forward to discuss it, he just took their numbers (we are not referred to by name in front of  the defendants) and dismissed them without further discussion.  The hilarious part was that after about 3 of them had been dismissed, others that were just hoping to get out of there caught on, and another 20-30 people abruptly stood up!  And each one was dismissed without question.  It was the one and only 'freebie' question that happened that day.

In the end, I wasn't called or dismissed as unqualified or undesirable - by 1pm, they'd found their 12 and the rest of us were released.

(For the curious - once I was off the selection, I was able to look up the trial case, and it involves a murder that occurred in order to kill off a witness in a previous murder case for which one of the defendants has already been convicted. The remaining two defendants are charged with carrying out the murder he hired them for - I'm still a little disappointed that I wasn't selected, even though those that were were told to expect at least a couple weeks worth of trial time.  I'd have loved to see how a trial like this actually happens.)

Now - how this impacted my 120 Days Challenge - the upheaval and difficulty of being able to fit it in actually threw me out of my routine for a few days after. I was tired, working on a terrible sleep deficit and babying a very sore body, and needing to play catch up on my regular daily tasks, and that was taking up all my "spoons".  I found myself having to work hard to re-establish my still-budding routine, and resisting wanting to expend the necessary energy to do so.

Home Repairs and Gross Weather

The second big challenge was shortly after, when our very new AC unit started shorting out every few hours, with the heat index up around 100F.  So suddenly, every day for a week was spent either trying to get repair people out, or dealing with them being here for long stretches.  Here again, my entire day was thrown off, and it was too hot and uncomfortable to want to even think about exercise. Or cooking.

They eventually figured out that a wire that should have been replaced when it was installed wasn't and was giving up the ghost rapidly.  I'm glad for the shorts, however annoying the whole thing was, because I have vision of that wire eventually just burning down the house!

I limped along with my plan, but the routine was again floundering, and eating choices were made for what's fast and ready to eat and needing no cooking rather than for what were my best nutritional options. (in other words, a whole lot of potato chips)  I knew I was making bad choices, but by that time I was starting to think in terms of "I DESERVE these chips - this day sucks!"

And yes - the My Life Balanced workbook talks about this sort of faulty thinking.  We tell ourselves we 'deserve' things that are bad for us instead of reminding ourselves we deserve foods and activities that make us feel better, healthier and stronger.

Eating at Social Events and Celebrations


The last challenge was the run up to a holiday weekend - we celebrate Midsummer with a large gathering of friends and there was a lot of planning that had to go into it.

The challenge here was, once again, fitting in time to keep to my routines and daily tasks when there were a lot of extra things to attend to, as well as the simple challenge of joining in with potluck style festivities without making a lot of (delicious) food choices that might not be a good idea nutritionally.

We brought a mixed berry crisp - sweet but still full of great foods - but there were a lot (LOT) of other dessert options and as a group we failed to ensure a good balance of healthy proteins and vegetables, so on the day I ate far more sweet things that would be good for anyone, and it caused me some immediate wellness impact I should have been able to avoid.

Again the biggest problem there was mental - I was firmly in the grip of "I DESERVE pie. And cake. And these cookies. What, no main dish? Ok then - CHEESECAKE!"

Ironically, the theme of our Midsummer gathering was Finding Balance with Creativity - and if I'd been more focused on creative solutions to achieving balance (an ongoing theme of the 120 Days Challenge), I could have saved myself a lot of literal heartburn this month.

My takeaways right now are these:

• I deserve to take appropriate care of myself, especially when life intrudes on my daily routine.
• I need to be prepared for unexpected upsets to routine, and learn how to be more flexible in addressing them.
• The more practiced I become at meditation, the better I'll be able to draw on it when I am experiencing boredom while waiting.
• Cheesecake will always be delicious. (Let's be real - that's just the truth.)

A good friend of ours often refers to challenges as "Opportunities to practice." - to practice mindfulness, to practice ones' ethics and faith, to practice integrity of commitment and action.  I'm taking that to heart and realize that uncovering the things that make sticking to my path aren't failures - they are opportunities to practice.

And so, Onward!

Previous posts in this series:
My Life Balanced - Introduction to a New Series
My Life Balanced - 1st Progress Report

I WAS FEATURED!

Anti-Procrastination Tuesday

My Life Balanced: Progress Report

I've been working with Vanessa Hartman's My Life Balanced: 120 Days workbook for the last 3 weeks, and want share a few things I've learned so far.

My first lesson is that there is a very good reason this challenge is meant to last at the very least 120 days - it's all about habit changing and it is very, very difficult to undo old habits and to integrate new ones all at the same time.  I have only barely scraped the surface at this point, and the simple act of spending a few minutes first thing in the morning 'setting my intentions' (as Vanessa calls looking over each day's materials) has been dredging up all sorts of resistance, but I've also realized that intending to do it later in the day instead results in never getting around to it at all.

So, yes - for this to work for me, I need to make this book the first thing I pick up after my cup of coffee, and then settle down to the two of them and get my head focused on how I will explore and incorporate the day's guideance.

My second lesson is that taking time to be still and meditate comes a lot easier when there's a little focus for it - I really, really love the one word "Mind" words that can be used as a journal prompt or meditation word.   They provide me with simple contemplative time early in the day before anyone else has woken up.  I like to spend 15-20 minutes sitting outside on my porch as the sun rises, watching the birds having breakfast, and considering how the daily theme might be meaningful for the day as I go about my routine.

As I mentioned in my Introduction to this process, I've tried using them as a theme for my daily Tarot readings (an old habit I plan to keep), and they work brilliantly that way. (this is in no way necessary, but I find it helpful to meld these new habits into areas of my life where I already feel I am on a useful track - it helps them stick!) For this, I enjoy doing a simple 3 card Mind-Body-Emotions spread, asking how each area relates to the daily meditation word.

As an example, today's theme word is Rest, and these are the cards I drew:

I asked the following and contemplated each answer:

How does my body speak to me about the need for Rest?

The 10 of Wands here is speaking to me about exhaustion or burnout - once the body has given all it can, it's done, and needs rest, whether I'm inclined to do so or not. Better management would be to pay attention before I'm on my last legs, and offer myself rest before I've reached that stopping point so that I can maintain energy reserves more consistently.

How does my mind speak to me about the need for Rest?

 The Page of Coins is the student in the area of the physical - my mental resources are curiosity and learning more about both the benefits of rest and how to go about maximizing the quality of my resting times.  (The Page of Coins in me is *loving* the My Life Balanced challenge, because it's all about this sort of learning)

How do my emotions speak to me about the need for Rest?

The 2 of Coins is all about lighthearted BALANCE, especially physical and material balance.  My emotions stay balanced when the rest of my life is in balance, and goes off kilter when there is too much or too little of the things I need.  When my mood is going wonky, it's time to look at how well I'm taking care of myself, and to bring in some playfulness.  And here, it may well be that I'm shorting my need for rest and recreation, whether it's a nap or a serene and fun environment.

As you can see, this method of using the meditation keys is really being helpful to giving myself some structure and food for thought.  But the remaining sections of each day's page also provide both motivational and practical tips for putting all this into practice.

On some days, for example, there will be concrete suggestions in the areas of self-image, nutrition or movement, such as "Write a list of ten things you love about yourself NOT related to appearance" or dancing to a favorite song or replacing sugary drinks with fruit and herb infused water. (All tasks I did and enjoyed very much.

On other days, the sections will be more informational, sharing the benefits of a particular food or form of movement, or motivational words reminding me that all of this begins first with an attitude of self-care and balance.  I am finding myself struggling a bit how to do more with these than read them and try to invent some sort of actual action to take or exercise to do to more firmly plant the seeds of change.  I've added a couple items to my grocery list and begun to experiment with forms of movement that I can safely do that are fun for me.

That would be my big lesson two: If it isn't fun, I am the QUEEN of procrastination.  And it's not like this is a lesson I didn't already know - I've just been confronted with it a lot.  Fortunately for me, this truth is also a key foundation of Vanessa's philosophy.  This sort of change isn't supposed to be about punishing you for not doing things optimally in the past.  It's all about liking yourself enough to add things to your life that make you feel great.

Image by Gratisopraphy

All in all, so far I am finding this all very helpful even if I am still learning how best to use it.  In terms of preferences, I'd love to have a copy of this that was smaller and more portable, even perhaps in electronic form or as a series of daily cards that could be put somewhere visible throughout the day.  I've found myself often going through my day and wanting to peek in again as a refresher to stay focused, and the larger format isn't readily tucked into a bag while on the go.  But that is a small matter and in no way diminishes the helpfulness of the wisdom within.

My intentions for the next three weeks are to use these materials to:

1. Assess what foods are helpful and which are harmful, by logging what I eat and how I feel after.
2. Work on increasing movement by taking walks, using music as I go through my day to encourage movement, and to note the opportunities for increased movement as I follow my normal daily routine.
3. Explore what undercuts my ability to sleep well (insomnia is becoming problematic), and determine what changes can be made to increase my ability to get adequate sleep.

I think that's enough for me, and I know that every day will bring me inspiration, both for these goals and new ideas for other areas to rethink.  I'm excited to continue - it really is true. The Goal IS the Journey.

My Life Balanced
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